I should have been a writer...

By: Andrea S. Yeager

Why do I think I should have been a writer? It's not because I think I'm extremely talented (Although, btw me and you we both know I am ;-) Conceited? No. Confident? Yes!) No but for real now, it's because I (pause) am (pause) inspired by everything around me. Tehehe, gotcha again! Actually I just heard that on some silly commercial on the telly. Now once again, let me attempt to answer the question of why I think I should have been a writer. Well it's because every day, every time I see or do something interesting, I think to myself how I'm going to write about it. Do I blog about? Most likely. Post it on Facebook? That's a good possibility. Tweet? Nah, I'm not really a tweeter (dontcha just love saying that word though???) But if I were a genuine entrepreneur, I would write down all these cool stories, keep them to myself and find a publisher/PR rep that would make me famous!! Well turns out, I am a huge fan of instant gratification (that's why I can't just stop at one glass of wine, why I've never done drugs - I'd most likely get addicted and why I always spend all my retirement money on pretty clothes and expensive handbags... no judging!!) and blogging gives me that instant grat of feeling like I've published my work. Even if it is a free for all on the internet!

SO since I've decided I should have been a writer, I took the liberty of writing down a few interesting things I saw today. Yes, I really did write them down on a piece of paper. I accidentally left it out on my desk at work today too and I really really hope that no one from my office saw it because they will think the new girl is uber weird (which is true) but this is what the list read:

1) 2 men / Italian rest
2) hot chocolate
3) db men

Confessions to the Botox Man

See, there is no way I could ever redeem myself if someone saw a piece of paper like this lying on my desk!! Please continue reading if you would like the deciphering of my coded scribbles. If not, thank you for reading thus far and have a lovely evening! :-)

You really do see a lot of random things working in the hotel industry........

1) 2 men / Italian rest
Okay so it's probably about 8 o'clock in the morning and these 2 men are coming up the stairs to go to a meeting. I hear them as they are on their way up and the conversation goes a little something like this:
Guy 1: "Do you know what kind of restaurant this is we're going to tonight?"
Guy 2: "Yeah, I think it's an Italian spot."
G1: "Yeah, I know that but I mean is it like cas or what?" (Yes, he used the word cas.)
G2: "I think so. I mean I'm just planning on wearing jeans and blah blah blah..."
G1: "Ok, cause I was going to ask what you were wearing."
(And yes, I'm pretty sure both of these men were heterosexual. Maybe this evolution of the modern man explains why I'm still not married at the ripe old age of 28?)

2) hot chocolate
I'm upstairs outside of the restaurant in the hotel and this woman comes up and asks me where she can get a cup of hot chocolate. Again, it's approximately 8.30 in the morning. Woman, you are 40+ years old. Why are you drinking hot chocolate at 8am???
(And maybe this evolution of woman explains why my 30 year old boyfriend is still unmarried! :-))

3)db men
This is more like a question for you bloggies. Why are so many older men douchebags? Now if I had a dollar for how many douchies I meet in a day, I would be able to shop AND save for that retirement fund! And if I slept with all these douchies for triple the money... well, then I'd be a prostitute! Hehehe. Seriously, I'm a really good judge of character and I think I can read people pretty well (another of my many talents!) and db's listen up: it's written all over your face. Capital D. Capital B. Use soap and scrub hard. It's gonna take a while to wash it off!

Confessions to the Botox Man
This is going to be the title of my next blog. Guess you will have to stay tuned to see!!